My time in Iraq has shattered my worldview. In some ways it has proven that I never really had a “world” view.

…And I think more than anything else, this has been illuminated for me by God’s grace.

Growing up as a Christian since age 8, my relationship with God has been defined differently at various stages of life. I understood grace when I was young, but that didn’t keep me from defining my faith – whether explicitly or implicitly – by what I didn’t do (didn’t cuss, smoke, drink, etc. ). Then in late High School I began to realize the childishness of my faith and so I began to define it by what I “did.” It wasn’t until college that I came to understand that my faith is simply defined by Grace.

Why was this the case for me? I think it’s because I “got Grace” like I “get” a math concept. “Oh, yeah, Algebra… I get it. What’s next?”

Those last two words are dangerous. Asking “what’s next” indicates there’s more to be had – that it’s not enough. But God’s grace is not a math concept on which to be built. It’s the numbers themselves.

The best part of all this, is that I was so eager to get beyond Grace (What’s next?) that I found that beyond Grace lies…. more Grace.

Now, as for how this applies to my time in Iraq – I went through the same process with the people here.

I “got it” – they show me grace, and I show them grace and all is good – so “what’s next?”

…Well, there are the don’ts. Don’t talk to women you don’t know, don’t blow your nose in public unless you want to create a panic, don’t ever. EVER. do anything other than just simply eating bread when you get it, don’t wear your shoes in houses, don’t go out of the house wearing shorts, don’t, don’t, don’t..

Then the moment of realization – “Simply not doing things is silly, what is it that I can do?”

So the do’s ensued. Do say “Choni? Bashi?” to every guy you make extended eye contact with, do stand up anytime a man enters the room, do dress up when you hang out with someone, do offer to pay for everything, do persistently argue to pay for everything, do eat the food in front of you… do, do, do….

Then finally I had that moment of grace. That coming back to the beginning. That moment of mutual understanding that we have differences, that I’m going to mess up and do something culturally abnormal and that they’re going to do something that I just don’t even understand.

Obviously the grace we extend each other is much different than Grace from God, but this grace all summer long has caused me to turn and worship our Creator many times over. It makes sense that our relationships be based on grace, since our ultimate relationship is based on Grace.

So as for my new world view? If it is possible to sum up in a sentence:

Everything pales in the presence of Grace.

Looking forward to seeing many of you soon, Inshallah!

Ted